1

The last big thing that we forgot to tell you about in 2009 was probably one of the hardest decisions we had to make in a long time. After a lot of discussion, prayer, and soul searching, Ryan decided that it was time for him to get out of the Marine Corps. For the two and a half years since his injury, his goal had been to recover and get back to doing what he loves. And he does love being a Marine and flying Cobras. But even as much as he loves the Marine Corps and the life that we have had on active duty, he decided that it was time for a change.

This decision did not come easily for either of us. Ryan's career got cut short at a time when it was really just starting to get fun. He missed out on the best years of being a Cobra pilot. He was getting past the part where he was still trying to figure things out and was not yet to the part where it starts to get political. He was about to tuck his first deployment under his belt and enjoy his years as a company grade officer. As for me, since I was seventeen, the Marine Corps has been my life. I went from enlisted, to officer, to dependent wife. I almost can't remember life before the Marine Corps. While it definitely has it's good and bad, it is the life we'd chosen and loved. Our friends were more like family and we felt very much at home. Even Jaida is struggling with the idea of not being a Marine kid anymore. She has grown up around Marines and has always been proud to be a part of the Marine Corps family. This is all she knows.

We have no doubt that we will find success and happiness in our civilian life, but it is definitely a detour from the road we thought we were on. Life changed and we are changing right along with it. While we know that this is right and good, it is still difficult and a little bit scary.

Since that day in November when the decision was made, we have been discussing, praying, and searching for what is next in our lives. We are waiting for the results of his medical board so we can begin the process for his retirement from the Marine Corps. Ryan has put in some job applications and we are still waiting for an offer. We are hoping to be moving west as early as this summer, with San Diego as our first choice for location. Wherever we end up and whatever we end up doing, we know that God has a plan for us and we are in this together.

2

Wow. So writing these posts took a lot longer than I originally planned. But that's our life. Which is probably why I was trying to catch you up on 2009 in the first place. And now I'm already way behind on all our 2010 activities. Guess I better get to it.

Our little miss Maya turned 4 in 2009, and it's been so much fun watching her personality develop. She can be very nurturing and motherly for her little brother, but with that comes a tendency toward bossiness. And I like to say that she is the most OCD of all my children. She likes things to be done the right way (ie., her way) or she will let you know about it. But Maya also is very witty and has excellent timing and delivery. She often will make a comment that has Ryan, Jaida, and I, all cracking up just thinking about it days later. Maya loves to run. Ryan will give Maya a "ready, set, go", and she will be off taking laps around the outside of the house with Noah trailing behind for about one lap. Noah loses interest pretty quickly, but Maya will just keep running and running. And then when she's finished she's very excited to show you how hard her heart is "beeping". Maya does not love bugs. Spiders, ants, bees, ladybugs, roly-polys, it doesn't matter. She doesn't like them. One day she was practically inconsolable because there was a ladybug on her shoe. Maya likes to make up songs and sing them to you. She likes to draw pictures and cut them out with scissors. She likes to sleep with her bed covered with stuffed animals and toys and just a little space left over for her to lay on. She likes to pretend she is a puppy. Maya likes tiny treasures and she likes to keep them in a little treasure box. Pennies, buttons, beads, they are all precious to her. Maya is very good at puzzles and can write the names of everyone in our family. Our little lady is so much fun and we feel blessed to have her in our lives.

Our little man Noah turned 2 in 2009. The last 12 months have been monumental in terms of his development. I think he learns new words everyday. Which also means you need to watch what you say in front of him. He is ALWAYS listening! And he is also quite the charmer. He knows how to turn it on when it works to his advantage. His teachers tell me they have the hardest time redirecting his misbehavior when he gives them his best grin. And I know exactly what they mean, he does it to me all the time. But even as charming as he can be, I never know for sure when he comes close to me, with a glint in his eye, what he's going to do. It seems he's just as likely to stroke my cheek, kiss me, or tell me he loves me, as he is to pinch me, bite me, or tackle me. He often will tell me, "Crabs will snap you, alligators will bite you, tigers will EAT you!" And he can turn just about any item into a weapon. His current favorite is using the stick part of the stick horse as a gun or sword. Like Maya, Noah likes to pretend that he is a dog. But while Maya likes you to give her dog commands that she can obey, Noah likes you to give him dog commands so he can look you in the eye and say, "No!" His favorite way to buy time or ignore anything he's told is to say, "One minute." We hear it most often when we tell him not to do something or to stop doing something. He says, "One minute," and just keeps doing whatever he wants. Noah loves to climb and jump. Never was this more apparent then one Monday morning last November when I heard a thump, a door opening and closing, then my door opening, and saw Noah sauntering into my room. Up until that morning, he had been sleeping in a crib. But once he figured out how to scale the side and stick the landing, that was no longer an option. It took awhile to convince him to stay in his bed all night, and it's still not always fool proof. Most of the time, after I put him to bed at night, I won't hear from him again until he comes in the morning to ask me if it's "wake up time". Noah is a character and it seems there's never a dull moment with him around.

I don't tell you often enough what the kids are up to, so I thought it rated an appearance on the top ten.

3

Jaida had quite an eventful 2009. And so much of it, I never told you about.

For instance, last spring, Jaida saw an advertisement for the North East School of the Arts (NESA). It is a magnet program on the Lee High School campus here in San Antonio. They offer seven majors in the arts that a student can focus on while getting a high school diploma. Jaida completed an application, resumé, prepared 10 pages of original creative writing, and spent an entire day interviewing and auditioning. We were told we would receive a letter within two weeks letting us know if she was accepted into their program. We got a phone call two days later. Jaida was accepted into her first choice program, Creative Writing. She was thrilled! And we are so proud of her. Being at NESA means that she has a more intense workload than she would have otherwise, as she takes two elective Creative Writing classes in addition to her primarily Pre A/P courses. But Jaida has juggled her responsibilities well and kept her grades stellar.

Jaida on the first day of high school

After Jaida got accepted into NESA, she didn't spend her summer waiting for something exciting to happen in the fall. She had a busy summer of traveling planned. She left at the beginning of July for California to stay with her Grandpa Davis and Mama Ruth. For the last two summers she has attended camp at Park Creek Bible Camp and was selected as Best Camper in summer 2008. That meant her tuition at camp this summer was free! She spent a couple days with Grandpa, then a wonderful week at camp, and then a few more days with Grandpa. But she wasn't done having fun quite yet, because then she hopped a plane to Honolulu!

Jaida's best friend, Taylor, lived in the house behind us from the day we moved into housing at Fort Sam. It didn't take long for these two girls to become inseparable. Unfortunately, military orders often make separation inevitable and Taylor's family moved to Hawaii in December 2008. Jaida was crushed and missed Taylor desperately. So it only made sense that Jaida wanted to go visit. Jaida, being the brilliant child that she is, came to me one day and said that she didn't want anything for her birthday. She didn't want presents or a party. She just wanted to visit Taylor. Ryan and I thought that was pretty reasonable, so that's just what she did. Taylor's family graciously hosted Jaida for two fun-filled weeks that Jaida will never forget. Jaida made a weeklong stop in Oregon to visit family before she finally ventured home to us in San Antonio. We really missed her all those weeks but were so glad she had those experiences.

Together again and all smiles!

An ocean can't keep these girls apart.

While I'm already posting what I'm sure Jaida will consider a thoroughly embarrassing post, let me brag about her just a little more. When Jaida was in 7th grade, she found out that the child of one of her teachers was diagnosed with leukemia. It really upset her and she wanted to do something about it. Someone told her that if you collected a gallon sized jug of soda pop tabs you could use it to pay for one chemo treatment. She immediately set out to save as many pop tops as she could. Later she did some research and discovered that wasn't true. But the pop tops weren't completely useless, the Ronald McDonald house accepts them as donations and recycles them to help offset their expenses. Jaida continued to save pop tops for more than two years. She even told a few of her friends to save them and they spread the word and brought her their collections. When it became apparent that the pop tops were taking over our garage, I told Jaida it was time for them to serve their purpose. Jaida called the Ronald McDonald house in Houston and asked them if they would accept her donation, and they did. Jaida and I toured their building and learned about the families that come to stay there. It was very moving and I was so glad Jaida could see the impact of her efforts.

Jaida with a small sampling of the gift she brought that day.

I don't think 2010 is going to be any less exciting for Jaida, considering she was nominated to be a student ambassador to China with the People to People program. She is still working through the application and letters of recommendation and has interviews scheduled for next month. (I'm sure there will be more discussion of it on the blog, so keep an eye out for that.) Jaida IS still a teenager and still drives us crazy sometimes, but Ryan and I are impressed with the young lady that we are raising and are thankful that God gave us such a great kid!

4

Ryan was duped.

A couple of months ago, Ryan's friend Pat invited him to go on a hunting trip. Pat had been invited to hunt and wasn't going to be able to make it, and asked Ryan to go in his place. Ryan hadn't been hunting since he was a kid, and back then I don't think he did so much hunting as hanging out and eating all the food that they brought. But he was ready for some "guy time" and a hunt sounded like just the ticket. The date was set for December and he was told they'd have everything he needed to hunt. Just pack a bag for the weekend and go have fun.

I didn't think much of it. I was all set to spend the weekend with the kids while Dad went off to shoot Bambi. But then I got a mysterious phone call. The caller was participating in the hunt and wanted to ask me a few questions about Ryan without Ryan's knowledge. The first one was simple, is Ryan left handed or right handed? But then they got more curious like, what kind of music does Ryan like? It became clear pretty quickly that they were planning some nice surprises for Ryan and I'm never one to ruin a good surprise. But it should have tipped me off when I asked how many wounded guys were going on the hunt and they said it was only Ryan.

The Friday morning of the hunting trip arrived and the kids were all off at school. It was just Ryan and I waiting for his ride and I was giving him the "Don't be like Dick Cheney" pep talk. A couple of trucks pulled up outside and a couple of guys jumped out. And there it was.....the video camera.

We invited them in, while the tape was running, and found out that Ryan was being surprised with a "Hunt of a Lifetime" thanks to Veteran Outdoors! Show host Cody Hirt was there surprising Ryan and I and Brad Strittmatter was capturing it all on video. I don't know who was more surprised, but I'm pretty sure both our mouths were hanging open. And I wanted to crawl under the couch when they asked to film me talking about what an opportunity like this means for us. I was certainly not "camera ready", but you'll see that yourself when the episode airs next fall. I don't want to tell you too much about the weekend but I'll be sure to post a link when it's going to be on TV.

What I can tell you is that Ryan had an AMAZING time and made friends for life with the guys he spent time with that weekend. There were so many surprises that I don't know how they'll fit them all into one episode and Ryan was so humbled by the kindness and generosity bestowed upon him. Below are just a few pictures from Ryan's weekend as a teaser for what is sure to be a great show!

Ryan with Ted Nugent and Cody Hirt

Ryan up close and personal with one of the residents at the YO Ranch.

These beauties were for enjoying not hunting.

Thanks to Pat Scrogin for recommending Ryan for this great opportunity! Pat had his own Hunt of a Lifetime and knew what an incredible experience this would be for Ryan. Thank you!

5

In May, our family participated in the Warrior Getaway hosted by the christian organization Joni & Friends. It was offered locally, in the Texas Hill Country and, unlike many, it was an event focused on the whole family.

Ryan and the kids take a break for a quick picture.

There were several recreational opportunities from horseback riding, to kayaking, to golf, and rock wall climbing. There were clowns and clown clothes so the kids (0r parents) could dress up and join in the fun. There was swimming, and jewelry making, and trips into town to do a little shopping. There was music and games at dinner, a family dance, a hilarious comedian one night, and an ice cream social another.

Maya and Trey climbing trees

But all the fun and laughs that we had weren't even the best part of the weekend.

Daddy and Noah like dinner.

Everyday there was an opportunity for the kids to go to supervised age appropriate activities, while the parents went to classes and break out sessions facilitated by the staff and volunteers at Joni & Friends. Our guest speaker for the weekend was Army LtCol. (retired) Brian Birdwell. Brian was severely burned on September 11, 2001, while working in the Pentagon. He offers a message of healing, hope, and forgiveness that so many people can relate to and it hit home with everyone present.

Trey and Maya pause for a little face painting.

The break out sessions gave the men and women time separately to talk about their experiences and connect with each other. There was laughter, tears, and a whole lot of honesty.

Ryan and Pam with Mel and Brian Birdwell

The weekend ended with a worship service that, like the rest of the weekend, was personal, honest, and deeply moving. It was hard to believe that in the four days we were there we had found so much peace and rest.

A family picture in the golf cart before we head for home

While we were at the Warrior Getaway, several families were asked to record a short interview about their experience during the weekend and which aspects were most valuable. We willingly participated and shared a little about our journey and how we came to be at the event.

A couple of months later, Ryan got an email from Doug Mazza, president of Joni & Friends International, asking Ryan to call him. We never could have imagined what came next. Our family was invited to come to Laguna Beach, California, in October to attend their President's Retreat. They were hoping we'd be willing to share our testimony and what the Getaway meant to us with the supporters of their ministry.

Noah's first time in the Pacific Ocean

Everything about our visit to California in October was so thoughtful. From our beautiful beach side resort, The Montage, to the welcome basket in our room complete with juice boxes, goldfish crackers, crayons and coloring books, and so much more. They provided transportation and tickets for our family to spend a day at Disneyland. And even Ken and Joni Eareckson Tada were interested in making our stay a pleasant one.

Maya loves the beach.

On Saturday morning it was our chance to stand on stage and share a little of our story. As we stood backstage, they played a video created to document the Warrior Getaway experience. Several families were featured, but our interview was really highlighted. After the video, Doug invited us onstage. We were greeted by a standing ovation that lasted for several minutes. It was unbelievable.

Jaida made friends with the Willis Clan.

We answered a few questions about the getaway and how much it meant to us to be a part of it. Meanwhile, Noah and Maya jumped up and down and generally had the wiggles the whole time. But no one seemed to mind. We were only onstage for a few minutes, but we were happy to do our part to continue their good work.

Ryan with Doug Mazza

At the next break, we were able to meet several of the other guests at the retreat. Before that we had not participated in any of the sessions. (I think they wanted our appearance to be a surprise.) Everyone wanted to meet Ryan and I and the kids, to hear more of our story and to thank Ryan for his service to our country.

Our family at Joni's 60th birthday celebration

The remainder of our weekend was full with a performance by The Willis Clan, a presentation from Joni Eareckson Tada, and Joni's 60th birthday celebration. Somehow we still managed to squeeze in a visit with my sister, Angie, and my dear friend Sarah. It was an amazing weekend!

The Joni & Friends organization does so much more than the Warrior Getaway. They have spent 30 years ministering to people with disabilities, and they continue their work with Wheels for the World, Family Retreats, radio ministry, and so much more. Joni's life story is such an inspirational one and she gives all the credit to God in everything she does. She has written books, recorded music, inspired movies, produced beautiful artwork, and changed lives all from the confines of a wheelchair due to quadriplegia. We were so honored to meet her and to play a small part in the continuation of the work she does with Joni & Friends.

6

Ryan and I had been to New York before, but never like we did at the end of August. We ventured north to attend the Phoenix Society's World Burn Congress. Operation Comfort was kind enough to host a group of about 30, burn survivors and their caregivers, and they pulled out all the stops. When we arrived in New York, the pilot asked the other passengers to remain seated so our group could deboard the plane. When we did, we were greeted by New York's finest firefighters and police officers and a round of applause from everyone nearby. I was not expecting that and it really got me choked up. The FDNY provided vehicles and escort to our hotel and it really started our trip off with a bang.

The World Burn Congress is held in a different city every year, but New York drew a bigger crowd than any year past. There were over 900 burn survivors, caregivers, medical professionals and firefighters in attendance from all over the world. Over the four days of the congress, there were guest speakers, break out sessions, classes, and open mic opportunities. Never had we been around so many burn survivors and it was very moving to hear all their stories. People who had been burned in house fires, work accidents, meth explosions, and domestic violence. People who had been burned at all ages, recently and long past. Obvious burn injuries and "invisible" burns. Everyone was willing to share and everyone was willing to listen. We learned so much in just a few days and were so glad to connect with Phoenix Society. The event ended with a gala on the last night, and by that time it seemed like we'd all known each other forever. It was sad to say goodbye.

Outside of the congress events, the firefighters were our New York City tour guides taking us to the Statue of Liberty, Ellis Island, Coney Island, and the World Trade Center Memorial and Museum. They took us for a ride on the Hudson in the marine one fire boat, for an authentic Italian dinner, to a street fair in Brooklyn, and fed us a huge meal at every station we visited. It was a tour of New York that we felt honored to be a part of.

The best part of our trip to New York was spending so much time getting to know the firefighters. There was such a connection between the military and the firefighters, and each had so much respect for the others' willingness to sacrifice their lives for others. What can you say for a group of people who run into a building when everyone else is running out, who run into the fire to try to keep others from being burned. We knew we were in the presence of heroes, it was very humbling.

We came home from New York with an unforgettable experience.

There are fire stations every few blocks in Manhattan because of the dense population in the city. Ladder 4 here is the "Pride of Midtown", while the Engine next to it read "Never Missed a Performance".

Tenhouse is the home of Engine 10 and Ladder 10 directly across the street from the World Trade Center. They suffered heavy losses on September 11, 2001.

All jazzed up for the gala.

As we were taking the ferry back from Liberty Island and Ellis Island, the fireboat put on a show just for us!

The firefighters in Brooklyn were kind enough to let a few of us slide down the fire pole.

No trip to Brooklyn is complete without a stop at Coney Island and a ride on the Wonder Wheel.

7

Now, back to the countdown.

In July, I was invited to Washington D.C. with the Wounded Warrior Project. They assembled a group of 21 caregivers to lobby on Capitol Hill for caregiver legislation. We arrived on Sunday and spent all day Monday discussing our needs as caregivers and reviewing the proposed legislation to see how it met our needs. Our group was a cross section of wives, mothers, and fathers who have provided care for the nation's most severely wounded. I felt out of place in a room full of people who are providing full time, lifetime care for severe traumatic brain injury, severe post traumatic stress disorder, and quadriplegia. But when we spent all day Tuesday and Wednesday with senators, congressmen, and directors of agencies that provide service to wounded veterans, I found that my input was valuable. The biggest concern for a lot of those we spoke to was the cost of this legislation. Opponents to the legislation were estimating that thousands of caregivers would be eligible for support under the proposed programs forever. But I was an example of someone who could have benefited for a period of time, but would eventually (and thankfully I have) outgrow the need. Unfortunately, most of the caregivers in our group would need support for the lifetime of their veteran.

Our efforts met with some success on November 19th, when the Senate unanimously passed S.1963, the Caregivers and Veterans Omnibus Health Services Act of 2009. However, the proposed House Caregiver Bill, H.R. 3155, is not nearly as comprehensive and only provides support for a fraction of the families that would be supported by S. 1963. If you would like to learn more about the legislation and take action to support the families of America's most severely wounded veterans, please go to the Wounded Warrior Project website to learn more.

I learned so much from my experience on Capitol Hill. It was interesting to see how laws are made and it felt good to do my part on behalf of all caregivers. More than anything I came home realizing, yet again, just how blessed I am to have my husband, in every way still the man I married.

I walked back and forth from the Senate to the House

more times than I could count.

But it was worth it!

Caregivers from Texas meet with Congressman Chet Edwards.

Brief interruption

I'd like to interrupt this Top Ten to bring you a little Christmas cheer.

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

Well, mostly merry.

8

If there's one thing I can say with certainty about our "post injury" life, it is that we have had a lot of opportunities that we wouldn't have had otherwise.

One of those opportunities came along in October. Our friend Chaz is one of the Marine Officer Instructors at Texas A&M University in College Station. He and his family moved to Texas last summer and even though they are only a couple hours away, we hadn't yet had a chance to visit.

When Chaz called Ryan and invited him to be a Guest Coach for a day at an Aggie football game, we thought that was a pretty good excuse to make the trek. We had no idea what a fun day it would be.

Ryan got a tour of the sports museum, a look at the press box, a special VIP breakfast, amazing seats for the game, and a great view of the Corps of Cadets marching into the stadium as he stood on field! But the best part was hanging out with an old friend.

Chaz and Ryan on the field.

Gig 'em!

One unexpected surprise was meeting former President George H. W. Bush. President Bush was kind enough to meet the guest coaches and take a few pictures before the game started.

The kids and I didn't go to the game, but we probably had more fun hanging out with Allison, Andrew, & Ava back at the house. Not to mention we had lunch at the Hullabaloo Diner and it was fabulous!

We can't wait to visit College Station and our dear friends again soon!

9

For as long as I can remember, Jaida has always wanted a dog. When she was little, she would ask and ask, and the answer was always no. So sometimes she just pretended to be a dog.

Jaida as "Max" the dog

When she got a little older, "no" wasn't enough. She wanted to know why. And when.

So, I told her she could have a dog when she was 8-years-old. That seemed so far off. And I thought by then I'd be ready.

I wasn't.

When she was 9, I was pregnant with Maya. The thought of having a new dog and a new baby at the same time didn't sound like such a good idea. And when Maya was 1, and Jaida was 11, I was pregnant with Noah.....and Ryan was deployed. Nope, still not the right time for a dog.

Then Ryan was injured. So we moved to San Antonio. Three girls with Daddy in the hospital.

Noah was born. And Ryan came home. Dogs were nowhere in our future.

But sometime last spring (I'm pretty sure it was when Jaida's guinea pig died) we started thinking about getting a dog. Ryan liked the idea. Jaida loved the idea. Maya and Noah loved dogs. And I was pretty sure I was ready to assume all responsibility for said creature, knowing that it was likely to be my duty most often. But not yet. We had a really busy summer planned and it wouldn't be fair to welcome a new dog into our home just to leave him repeatedly. So we just started thinking about what kind of dog we wanted and where we would get him.

After much discussion, debate, and research we came to a decision. We wanted a small dog because it would mostly be indoors. But not so small that Noah could easily crush it. We wanted a smart dog so that we could train it to be well behaved. But we wanted our dog to be energetic and fun to play with. And important to me, but not really anyone else, was having a dog that didn't shed a lot.

And we all agreed we wanted a rescue dog. We wanted to save a life and give a dog a home and a family.

Our searching led us to the Poodle Rescue of Houston. We made the drive on Labor Day weekend and found the dog for us.

At last!

He's a brown miniature poodle weighing about 16 lbs. We think he's about 4-years-old, but we don't know for sure. He's an anxious little guy, but he's doing well with his training. He's very protective, especially of the children. And he's very tolerant, especially of Noah laying on him, pulling his tail, and petting him in a less than gentle way. (We're working on Noah's training and it's taking a little longer!) His name is Huey (like the helicopter) and he's a welcome addition to our family.

And speaking of additions to our family, don't ask me why getting a dog when I was pregnant with Maya seemed ridiculous, but getting a dog when I'm pregnant now doesn't. I guess because it's my 4th baby I think I can handle anything. Ha!

Huey feels right at home.

10

Will someone please tell me where the year 2009 went?

A new year is upon us and as I look back over my blog, I see I have neglected to blog about several things that we did in 2009. So here are the top ten things, in no particular order, I forgot to tell you last year.

#10

In February, I told you about an amazing trip we took to Vail, Colorado, with the Vail Veterans Program. Ryan was able to snowboard for the first time since his injury. What I didn't tell you is that we were invited back to attend their summer program in July. The summer program gave us the opportunity to go fly fishing, white water rafting, and horseback riding, in addition to just enjoying the beautiful mountains and connecting with other wounded service members and their families. Photographer John Moore captured some of the best images of the trip in this slideshow.

Yet again, Cheryl Jensen, founder of the Vail Veterans Program, managed to think of everything to make this trip challenging, inspiring, and empowering.

No amount of rain could ruin our day

when we're fly fishing on the Colorado River.

I managed to get a fish on the line,

but I couldn't bring him in. Maybe next time.

A trail ride with my sweetie before dinner is a nice way

to end a great day.

After just a few nights at the Yarmony Creek Ranch

we felt like we could stay forever.

Back in Vail, the view from the top of the mountain

is just as beautiful without all the snow.

Lots of happy faces after an unforgettable stay in Colorado.

We're even more excited to be going back to Vail for their winter program again at the end of January 2010. And this time it is a family program! Be watching for pictures of our little family tackling the slopes in Vail. And tune in tomorrow for #9 on the list of things not blogged about yet this year!

Wordless Wednesday